Wonderland
by adAprilShower
Summary: Izuru Kira wanders into a rabbit hole and into a magical land, a Bleach version of Alice in Wonderland with hints of Ginkira


Ah, Hello

**Ah, Hello. This is my first Bleach fanfiction, yeah…I really have nothing to say. This story is meant to just be something cute. Hope you all like it. I used the ideas of the Alice in Wonderland parody from Ouran High School Host Club (vol 4). **

**Summary: Izuru Kira wanders into a rabbit hole and into a magical land, a Bleach version of Alice in Wonderland with hints of Ginkira. **

**Wonderland**

Once upon a time there was an adorable lieutenant named Izuru Kira. On a Sunday afternoon, Izuru was sitting under a tree reading like a good little shinigami, when suddenly…

"I'm late, I'm late!"

Izuru looked up from his reading to see a boy with rabbit-like features that looked suspiciously like Hanatarou of the fourth division running past him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Izuru asked, but the rabbit didn't answer him and kept running until he suddenly disappeared. "What the…?" Izuru said in confusion. He went over to where the rabbit had been to see a deep, dark hole, "So that's where he went."

Curiosity now piqued, Izuru decided to go down the hole also.

"Well, might as well check-aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

_Thump_

Izuru looked around to find himself in what looked like a kitchen. He also saw the rabbit that looked like Hanatarou (for the sake of the story, let's just call him Hanatarou from now on) going through a door, a very, very small door.

"Now what am I to do?" Izuru asked himself.

"Maybe I can be of assistance."

Izuru turned around to see a man with a striking resemblance to Mayuri, the captain of the twelfth division.

"I, Mayuri, have a solution to get you through that door," Mayuri said, and pulled a vial of liquid out of his sleeve, "This is a shrinking potion, it will make you small to get you through that door. (Or give you AIDS)"

"Well, I don't really want to go through the door…I just want to go home now," Izuru said.

"**TAKE IT!** I mean…it will help you get back. The way back to your home is through that door."

"Well…alright. Thanks," Izuru said, taking the vial. Mayuri disappeared and Izuru drank just a bit of the potion.

_Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooop_

"That was fast," Izuru said, looking around. Izuru went through the door to find himself in a spooky forest. "This is the way back to Soul Society?" he asked, skeptical.

"What do we have here?"

Izuru looked next to him to see two women and a man resembling Nanao of the eighth division, Yumichika of the eleventh division and Isane of the fourth division sitting on a flower.

"What is such a horrid species doing in our beautiful garden?" Yumichika asked.

"That's not very nice, Yumichika," Isane said.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude," Izuru said.

"You sure are ugly for a flower," Nanao observed.

"I'm not a flower, I'm a shinigami," Izuru said.

The three looked at him confusedly. "What's that?" Isane asked.

"Something terribly ugly, no doubt," Yumichika said.

"No! I shinigami is…never mind," Izuru said, exasperated, "How do I get out of this place?"

"Why would you want to leave?" Isane asked.

"This isn't my home! I live in soul society! I want to go home!" Izuru said, becoming panicked.

"There's no way to get back to this 'soul society' you seek," Nanao said.

"What?! Is this place cursed or something?!" Izuru said.

"Well, actually…" Isane started to say.

"It is," Nanao said, "We used to live under the rule of a kind queen, Retsu Unohana, but she became ill and another, meaner, queen took over and put a curse on us."

"Now we have to live in this sinfully ugly land, here in darkness," Yumichika said despairingly.

"That's horrible!" Izuru said, "I can't let this continue! Don't worry; I'll save you from the evil queen!"

"You will?!" Isane asked, looking hopeful.

"Of course," Izuru promised, "Where can I find more information on this queen?"

"Well…"

**-Wonderland-**

Izuru looked up from the poorly drawn map he had been given to see a large mansion. "This must be it," Izuru said to himself. According to the 'flowers' this is where a duchess lives, who knows all about goings on in Wonderland.

Izuru knocked cautiously at the door and barely a second after he did so, the door swung open and Izuru got a face full of boobs.

"Um…h-hello," Izuru said nervously.

"Hello!" the duchess said cheerily, seemingly unaware of her enormous cleavage nearly ripping the bust of her dress, "I'm Rangiku Matsumoto, also known as the duchess. What are you here for?"

"Well, I'm here to ask you about the queen…" Izuru started to say.

Rangiku gasped, "The queen?! Are you here to save me from her?" she asked.

"Well, I don't-,"

"You're too kind. She's going to have me executed. She's just jealous of my breasts, I swear."

"That's-um…"

"And whatever will happen to my baby?!"

"Baby?" Izuru questioned, following her over to a bassinet. Izuru looked at the baby.

"Matsumotooooooooooooooooo! I'm not a baby!"

"My dear Toshiro," Rangiku said, picking up the larger than average 'baby'.

"It's Hitsugaya to you, you freak," Hitsugaya said, but the duchess was oblivious.

"Such a dear child," Rangiku said, "Though he is a little noisy."

_Slam_

"We're here to collect Rangiku Matsumoto on orders of the queen!" one of the two soldiers that had just entered said. The seized Rangiku and began dragging her away. "Please kind sir, save me from the queen. She will be at her castle!" she yelled, just before the three were out of sight.

"I guess I better make my way to the castle…wherever that is," Izuru said. He looked down at the 'baby'. "I better take you with me. Shouldn't leave a baby alone."

"I don't think so," when Hitsugaya said that though, Izuru lifted him from his bassinet.

"Sure are a heavy baby," Izuru commented, carrying Hitsugaya away.

**-Wonderland-**

"Does this little guy really think he can do away with the queen?"

Izuru looked up into a tree to see a little pink haired girl with cat ears and tail watching him. "Who're you?" he asked.

"I'm Yachiru, the Cheshire cat," the girl replied, "Though I wouldn't mind if you got rid of that meanie queenie. She locked away my friend Ken-chan."

"Well, 'Ken-chan' can get a little out of control."

Yachiru, Izuru and a disgruntled Hitsugaya looked over to see a garden where three people were having a tea party. The three men looked strangely similar to Gin Ichimaru of the third division, Jushiro Ukitake of the thirteenth division and Shunsui Kyoraku of the eighth division.

"Mad Hatter Gin, I thought you were executed," Yachiru said.

"Ah ha! I broke out of jail of course, easy as pie" Gin said, "Though I must agree with the kitty on this one." Gin walked over to Izuru and smiled creepily at him, "A pretty little guy like you shouldn't have to fight the big, bad queen. I'll have the honor of getting rid of her and afterwards…you can have the honor of getting to know me better." Gin said slyly, making Izuru blush.

Ukitake, now just beginning to pay attention, saw Hitsugaya and his face lit up. "Well, well, well, who is this little bundle of sweetness?" he asked, walking over to the group.

"This is…Toshiro, I think it was," Izuru said.

"Shiro-chan! How cute. May I hold him?" Ukitake asked.

"Sure…" Izuru said, getting tired of holding the heavy 'bundle of sweetness' anyway.

"Hey, back off man," Hitsugaya said, as Ukitake picked him up, "And I thought Matsumoto was bad."

"What a sweetheart," Ukitake said.

"Anyways, we must think of a plan to rid this place of the queen," Gin said.

"Alright!"

**-In the queen's castle-**

"These little punks think they can defeat me?" the queen said, "We'll see about that…Tousen, call these people to my chamber."

"As you wish."

**-Wonderland-**

"I'm surprise the queen asked us to her castle," Izuru said.

"No matter, this just makes out plan easier," Gin assured.

"I rather not get my head chopped off so…see ya guys," Yachiru said, disappearing.

"Great, we lost someone already," Izuru said.

"Don't worry, we can still do it," Gin said.

The group consisting of, Izuru, Gin, Ukitake and Hitsugaya (Shunsui declined to going, having run into a Miss Nanao) entered the queen's chamber.

The queen sat high on her-wait a minute.

"That's a man," Izuru said.

"Silence! Did I, Queen Aizen, say you could speak?" the 'queen' asked.

"We're here to end your reign of terror," Ukitake said.

"And have the perfect plan to do so," Gin said, removing what looked like a small sword from a sheath Izuru hadn't noticed before, "Ikorose, Shinsou."

**-Wonderland-**

"Wait!" Izuru suddenly shot up from where he was lying on a desk with paperwork all over it. Izuru looked around, confused. "Oh, it was only a dream," he said, relieved.

"Oh Izuru…"

"Oh…hi, Taichou," Izuru said, looking at Gin sheepishly.

"Did you doze off again?" he asked.

"Sorry, Taichou…"

"That's not good. Do you know what happens to lieutenants that don't finish their work?"

"It's your work…" Izuru mumbled under his breath.

"That's right, they get punished," Gin said, ignoring Izuru's comment, "Follow me."

"You're not going to take me to the detention center are you?" Izuru asked, following Gin out of the room.

"Don't worry, nothing like that," Gin said, leading Izuru to his room.

"Why are we here?"

"For you punishment," Gin said, pushing Izuru into the room.

"But what does-aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

**And they all lived happily ever after (except Izuru)**

**I quite like this, I think it's very cute. Hope you all enjoyed. Please review. **


End file.
